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Bit of an update
Dec. 14th, 2010 11:18 pmtl;dr version: scroll down for photos. The rest of this jumps around a bit.
Spectacular weekend in so many ways! Colonial Williamsburg was its usual self. This is the fourth time we've been there (obviously, we love it) and we did things at our own pace. We viewed a number of museum exhibits, took one walking tour, and only toured one of the buildings - the Coffee House, which was merely a foundation under a large pavilion roof when we were last there.
It was a great time relationship-wise and transition-wise, and the latter really surprising me. The gendering generally continued through the weekend. There were exceptions but they were exceptions! It even happened at a restaurant after we returned home. This was a huge boost because I generally wasn't doing anything other than voice and non-verbals that I learned in the class to effect this. My clothing was that which I've been wearing regularly; in fact, to dinner Friday night was exactly what I'd wear at work on days I take the car (if on the bike I'd have boots on instead of sneakers.)
I'm beginning to seriously present as female when off-work. I had held off on doing that because I knew switching back to "boy-mode" when I had to, e.g. for work, was going to be very difficult for me. One exception will be family time over the holidays. I'm trying to find a non-event day (not one of the holidays or my niece's birthday) to have The Talk with them. I'd like to be able to have that chat with both my parents and my brother face-to-face and the latter is a limiting factor. If not when he's in town late this year he'll be 500-ish miles from me for months.
I've set a goal-deadline for being FT. I know I have a lot to do by then but it doesn't feel overwhelming now. Of course, the realities of dealing with the bureaucracy that is the State of North Carolina may lead to that being delayed, but I can deal with that.
Monday of last week I met with the person I mentioned before. She works in another campus department. I did get some useful information but the pinnacle of her strategy, while brilliant, isn't available to me. Her first was with the chair of her department, which seems simple enough, but a large factor in that was who occupied this position: a man with considerable stature in the industry, who also founded that department and when an expansion was constructed for the building it was named for him rather than being [existing building name] Annex as was the usual then. Neither the CIO nor the CTO of my division has anything approaching that stature.
She shared what happened with the bathroom issue, which, while somewhat annoying, was probably the best possible result, which is how she viewed it. HR sent a facilitator and the agreement was that she could use any women's restroom except the first floor one (which is located in the building's lobby.) Six months later HR re-examined the issue and that restriction was dropped. My building does have a a single unisex facility which happens to be on the same floor as where my desk is located. I'm not opposed to it being part of the deal but only a short-term part.
Photos: I have plenty but have had little time to get them into order. Here are a couple good ones:
My sweetie! I'm rather pleased with this shot.
Courthouse.
The foreground structures are chevaux de frise - an anti-infantry defensive device. Except for two breaks they ring the Magazine, which was behind me and to my left. The Magazine itself is an interesting structure; one of the few original ones (most are reconstructed) which was nearly lost but the townspeople took action to prevent that.
Governor's Palace.
I was at the far end of the Palace Green for this shot.
Spectacular weekend in so many ways! Colonial Williamsburg was its usual self. This is the fourth time we've been there (obviously, we love it) and we did things at our own pace. We viewed a number of museum exhibits, took one walking tour, and only toured one of the buildings - the Coffee House, which was merely a foundation under a large pavilion roof when we were last there.
It was a great time relationship-wise and transition-wise, and the latter really surprising me. The gendering generally continued through the weekend. There were exceptions but they were exceptions! It even happened at a restaurant after we returned home. This was a huge boost because I generally wasn't doing anything other than voice and non-verbals that I learned in the class to effect this. My clothing was that which I've been wearing regularly; in fact, to dinner Friday night was exactly what I'd wear at work on days I take the car (if on the bike I'd have boots on instead of sneakers.)
I'm beginning to seriously present as female when off-work. I had held off on doing that because I knew switching back to "boy-mode" when I had to, e.g. for work, was going to be very difficult for me. One exception will be family time over the holidays. I'm trying to find a non-event day (not one of the holidays or my niece's birthday) to have The Talk with them. I'd like to be able to have that chat with both my parents and my brother face-to-face and the latter is a limiting factor. If not when he's in town late this year he'll be 500-ish miles from me for months.
I've set a goal-deadline for being FT. I know I have a lot to do by then but it doesn't feel overwhelming now. Of course, the realities of dealing with the bureaucracy that is the State of North Carolina may lead to that being delayed, but I can deal with that.
Monday of last week I met with the person I mentioned before. She works in another campus department. I did get some useful information but the pinnacle of her strategy, while brilliant, isn't available to me. Her first was with the chair of her department, which seems simple enough, but a large factor in that was who occupied this position: a man with considerable stature in the industry, who also founded that department and when an expansion was constructed for the building it was named for him rather than being [existing building name] Annex as was the usual then. Neither the CIO nor the CTO of my division has anything approaching that stature.
She shared what happened with the bathroom issue, which, while somewhat annoying, was probably the best possible result, which is how she viewed it. HR sent a facilitator and the agreement was that she could use any women's restroom except the first floor one (which is located in the building's lobby.) Six months later HR re-examined the issue and that restriction was dropped. My building does have a a single unisex facility which happens to be on the same floor as where my desk is located. I'm not opposed to it being part of the deal but only a short-term part.
Photos: I have plenty but have had little time to get them into order. Here are a couple good ones:
My sweetie! I'm rather pleased with this shot.
Courthouse.
The foreground structures are chevaux de frise - an anti-infantry defensive device. Except for two breaks they ring the Magazine, which was behind me and to my left. The Magazine itself is an interesting structure; one of the few original ones (most are reconstructed) which was nearly lost but the townspeople took action to prevent that.
Governor's Palace.
I was at the far end of the Palace Green for this shot.
