A few things.

[agent_dani]

Officially have a consultation with Dr. P, scheduled for April 6. This is the other doctor (an endo, too) in the region who will prescribe HRT. I'm hopeful to finally get better progress as mine with Dr. H has been painfully slow - it's been an uphill battle with her to just get to the point where I get results and I know that if I were to ask for an increase it would be 25mcg/d (VivelleDOT/Estradot) as that is the only amount she's been willing to increase it for me.

Figured out something about my boss; he operates entirely on the negotiation method. The lesson here is to seriously pad my estimates, e.g. if it will take a week, start by saying it will take three, because if I say one, he'll try counter with one or two days, and half a week is the best I'll get from him. I may also want to try giving hours estimates as he isn't so willing to do so with those.

We ordered a lawnmower. We did have one, but it's a ZTR that will be complete overkill at the house we're buying (it made sense for the 2 acres in PA.) We went with a cordless electric push mower this time, the Neuton CE5. We'll be selling the ZTR.

I've had a considerable amount of work frustration of late. It really is microaggression crap - mostly petty, minor stuff that would be easy to ignore if not for the sheer volume and persistence (and that passive-aggressive crap really gets under my skin.)

Comments

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

Why is it that folks on your side of the pond seem to be so scared of HRT?

[lietya.livejournal.com]

With any luck, very soon Dr. H will be an unpleasant memory. And if P can't do it, you can always ask a GP - by now you have a good solid history demonstrating what you need [and can tolerate].


"I've had a considerable amount of work frustration of late. It really is microaggression crap - mostly petty, minor stuff that would be easy to ignore if not for the sheer volume and persistence (and that passive-aggressive crap really gets under my skin.)"

I know the feeling. :(

[lietya.livejournal.com]

I think it depends very much on the doctor... I know that in our area there's a fairly long list of endos willing to prescribe and do so at the necessary dosage.

(On the other hand, you really don't want to get me going about how big a pain in the ass private insurance has been, and that's with them even *actually covering* my wife's HRT. [policy is through me, so I've been doing all the battling with them.])

[bear-foot.livejournal.com]

*hugs* wrt boss, just become scotty... multiply ans time (Star trek) ;)

[lietya.livejournal.com]

Ha! I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought that!

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

Which is why I'm glad we still have this little thing called the NHS. It's a long way from perfect, but..........

[lietya.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that's more or less what I was getting at. :) I'd be absolutely thrilled by a similar public option in the US.

Even though scattermoon has been having such a prolonged and byzantine battle with the NHS, so I suppose occasionally someone still gets unlucky under that system, it's considerably better overall.

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

I know all about Ellie's travails and think it quite wrong that CX still plays these silly games with people's lives and mental health. Pshrink (almost invariably male, you notice?) power games worry me deeply :o(

Luckily, I managed to pay for that element of things privately many years back........

[agent_dani]

auntysarah put it a little differently, focusing on their willingness to prescribe HRT so long as it was non-feminizing doses.

True, the initial dose, 50mcg Estradiol transdermal and no AA, is one that was sufficient for one person I know, but she is very much the exception. For most that I know, having an anti-androgen and higher doses of E were necessary, and it clearly is for me (I had no results from HRT for the first year of treatment, which meant two years into transition, for that reason.)

[lietya.livejournal.com]

It is just indefensible, the shit they get away with. That combination of bureaucracy and power play is nasty. And yes, the horror stories I've heard have almost all been about men, too. (Although Dani's own therapist is female and ... problematic.) A certain type of man must find the temptation to exercise that kind of control over a woman's life just irresistible, and the system is set up so the assholes generally get away with it.

And that's one thing that's often overlooked in the argument about public healthcare in the US - going private is *always* an alternative. I'm glad you were able to take care of yourself if the NHS wouldn't. Similarly, we've been paying for HRT privately rather than touch insurance before she was legally listed as female (which was a couple months ago). I have to admit that I wouldn't mind not having to come up with $20K on our own, though. ;)

[agent_dani]

If I can find a GP willing to prescribe at all; my conversations with even long-transitioned people in the area haven't been positive on that front. And that really boggles my mind as, to me, the point of a specialist is because there is something unusual, not just to receive long-term maintenance doses.

*hugs* I'm sorry that you are. :( Yesterday's best example was not being believed when I said that I didn't know how to fix something as when I did the installs that didn't happen. It wasn't fully a surprise because that coworker has a long history of also believing that his experiences are the entirety of the truth, e.g. that if we document problems that he doesn't encounter they didn't actually exist when we were dealing with it. Like I said, petty...and inane.

[agent_dani]

I did as well!

I want to make them read "The mythical Man-Month" but I also am depressed they have no idea of the concept since its author works here (he founded my employer's Computer Science department.) Just as doubling the number of people assigned to the project doesn't halve the time, demanding that we work double-length days won't.

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

I was lucky not to need AA's (took them for a short time and went totally manic- it turned out that I had suffered from PAIS in utero, so they were trying to fight something that wasn't there! Oestrogen (with a little help from progesterone) pretty much did it for me too :o)

[lietya.livejournal.com]

That *is* bizarre. You clearly live in an area that is wholly backwards on the whole subject, as being unable to find any medical professionals willing to behave both ethically and competently is remarkable in this day and age. (I do believe you, I just think it's amazing that such pockets still exist.) I agree that the specialist is generally for setting up the "unusual" situation, not necessarily maintenance; it's probably still good to check in occasionally, but there's no reason why a GP couldn't handle the majority of the interim prescribing and monitoring.

*hugs back* That's ludicrous. There comes a point when all you can do is accept that these people are not living in the same reality you are. SOf course, as you just said, even ignoring takes a little mental effort... and when it's happening fifty times a day, it becomes the death by a thousand cuts to one's sanity (and patience!). Yeah, I've been there.

[lietya.livejournal.com]

:) I guess at least you can be amused by channeling Scotty as you work with him!

Yeah, when the man *works there* and they haven't met the idea, the odds that it'd be accepted are not high. Unfortunately.

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

I was lucky that a favourite Great Uncle (a former WW2 bomber rear gunner) died and left me a little money at the right time.

I often wonder what he'd have though of what I spent it on £4k was worth a great deal more back then! :o)

[lietya.livejournal.com]

Very nice!

Hey, it made your life infinitely better... maybe he would have appreciated that. Amusing to think, though.

(By way of comparison, $20K is about 2/3 of my wife's yearly income. It's doable, but ouch.)

[agent_dani]

My insurance, via my employer, is paying for it, but only because the plan administrator hasn't figured it out and isn't particularly motivated to do so - my state self-funds for its employees and hires a big insurance company to do the administration so the "we get to pocket the premiums" motivation is reduced for the company.

I expect that at some point in the process I'll end-up having to pay the full cost out of my own pocket because my state has classified transition as "cosmetic" and officially covers nothing. The exception will be if I get a differnt job first.

[agent_dani]

Nice! AAs were very much necessary for me. The attempts at E-only just reduced T from "low but normal for male" to "bottom end of low but normal for male." Spiro has made all the difference in the world for me.

[agent_dani]

Either that or the people in the local trans community aren't so willing to share, at least not on the one e-mail list in the region. I can believe it's that since the list is so dominated by egos...

[agent_dani]

My therapist, endo (both existing and the new one) and GP are all women. GP is great, prescription matter aside.

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

I know he'd have been glad that I became a historian and that was a bye product, so........:o)

It's a lot of money and as you say- ouch!

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

'Cosmetic'?

Facepalm :oZ

[cmcmck.livejournal.com]

Finding that little fact out explained a great deal which had puzzled me! :o)

[agent_dani]

Really. Same reaction I had when I asked my endo for AAs and she tried to convince me that I was one of the people for whom HRT didn't work...

[windrdr.livejournal.com]

There is always the option of my insurance.